Most of us go about our day being bombarded by noises from every direction. We wake to the sound of an alarm clock, horns, talks or even movement of people around us. Being able to physically and mentally focus on any one sound can be difficult, if not impossible at times. You can improve your listening skill by practicing some guidelines:
1. Exercise your ears.
I suggest to start by practicing this exercise in a relaxed atmosphere, where you can let your mind clear and your ears take in as many sounds as possible. With regular practice, you should find yourself being able to separate and zero in on individual sounds much easier and faster in any situation.
2. Enter every conversation expecting to learn. Expectation can begin a conversation long before a single word is spoken. What we “think” is going to happen in a conversation can greatly impact how we enter it.Going into a conversation, expecting to be taught, helps set a relaxed mind and body that is open to listen, then speak. You never know, you might come away with more knowledge than you ever expected.
3. Get as close as possible to the other person without making them feel and look uncomfortable. If you invade someone’s “personal space,” you will not receive the true message no matter what the distance is between each of you.
4. Maintain good eye contact. People look for understanding in the face and eyes. When you look away while somone is talking, you don’t give them a chance to see your understanding, or lack of it. You WILL miss something they say and run the risk of insulting them.
5. Ask to have something repeated if you don’t understand it. There is no disrespect in asking for clarification, especially if there are distractions. In fact, asking for clarification is one of the best ways to honor someone (I think what you have to say is important, but I didn’t get all of what you said, would you repeat it?).
6. Smile often and show relaxed body posture (i.e. open arms, relaxed brow, etc.) Even among distractions, people are more likely to persist in trying to get their message to you if you show they are “welcome” with non-verbal cues.
7. Don’t let emotion “rule” your side of the conversation.
Having this personally happen to me, I can tell you it is almost easier to just excuse yourself from the conversation. In every instance, when I was interrupted in a noisy place, the conversation lost direction and emotion, becoming very difficult to recover.
Have you ever noticed when you let someone talk long enough, they will begin to tell you everything about them or their special interests? They begin to trust you because you show genuine interest, respect and love.
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